In the woman-gynaecologist relationship there is very often extreme difficulty, unease and incomprehension in that the request for help, and consequently the symptoms put forward, does not represent the real need. It is up to the gynecologist to decode the female code and understand the woman's request, by putting aside his personal point of view and his medical code. Otherwise a vicious circle is created which merely leads to disappointment and frustration on both sides. The main factors which impede a true and fruitful understanding between the woman and the gynecologist are described.